Gratitude

Adopting the Mindset

Gratitude is something I exercise daily, in a variety of ways.  I wish I had arrived at a “gratitude mindset” on my own, but I did not.  My first step into adopting the mindset came with a professional development session provided by our school district nearly 15 years ago.  At that session, Hal Urban was our presenter; the guy rocked my world!  I remember Mr. Urban talking about being a single father, raising three boys on his own.  He talked about their nightly supper routine:  the three boys helped with meal prep, table setting, and clean up.  In addition, and most important, the conversation each night started with the question, “What are you thankful for today?”  As a result of this session, things quickly (like… that very night!) changed with our suppertime routine in the Kruse household.  In addition to three Kruse boys becoming helpers in the kitchen with meal prep and clean up, our conversation started in the same way as the Urban household.  It was met with resistance at different times (my husband just may have been the first resistor!), and it has taken on different iterations over the years (we currently ask and answer, “What was the best part of your day?”), but it is a staple at our dinner table.  I understand that my brother and his family adopted the practice, as well, after breaking bread with us a time or two.

 

Nurturing the Mindset

Adopting a gratitude mindset is one thing; nurturing it is another.  One can easily adopt a gratitude mindset, just to fall into old habits with the passing of time.  As with anything else, maintenance is key.  For me, that maintenance comes in the form of heeding the recommendations from others in the form of books, webinars, articles, and blogs.  I’ve built an arsenal, and look forward to continually adding to it.  One of the most powerful habits that was recommended in one of the above mentioned formats was the habit of waking each morning and before getting out of bed, taking five deep breaths, thinking of something I’m thankful for with each breath.  The most challenging part of this routine is that I sometimes fall back asleep mid-“thankful thought!”  Starting the day off with thoughts centered on gratitude sets the tone for the day.  I think of this routine as putting on my armor for the day:  there are sure to be challenges throughout the day; meeting them with a positive mindset (armor) in place assists in being a “solutions-oriented and forward thinking” person, as opposed to getting bogged down with the trials and challenges of daily life.  Maintaining a positive mindset is tough to do during challenging times, all the more reason to establish and nurture the habit.

Check out my “Arsenal” of Resources:  Positive Thinking Resources

Sharing the Mindset with Others

Sharing a positive mindset with others can be a tricky road to navigate.  There is a lot of “reading the situation,” before launching into a deluge of positive quotes, ideas, and resources.  For example, when people are sharing about the difficulties they are facing, the worst thing we can probably do is start inundating them with advice and the before-mentioned deluge of positivity.  Instead, the best thing we can probably do is listen, with body language that demonstrates we are doing just that (head nods, eyes on the person sharing, a comforting hand on their shoulder…).  We might consider saying things like, “That must be terribly difficult,” or “I’m so glad I can be here with you,” or “It’s great that you are able to get this off your chest.”  When the other person seems ready (and they may not… and “reading the situation” is tricky), we might add, something like, “I’ve found a lot of comfort in this podcast…” or “Reading __________’s book really helped me out.”

In addition to being there for someone during tough situations, our day to day words and actions speak volumes.  In a March 2021 post, I wrote about a purple bracelet, inspired by Will Bowen’s A Complaint Free World, that I’ve recently returned to wearing.  This small act not only positions me to monitor my mindset, but sometimes prompts others to ask about the bracelet, which becomes the perfect opportunity to explain, and perhaps inspire someone else.  The purple bracelet has more to do with avoiding complaining, gossiping, and criticizing than it does with gratitude, but avoidance of these three behaviors naturally leads to the opposite:  positivity and gratitude.  It’s one thing to adopt a positive mindset, but if we forget to compliment, thank, or simply acknowledge the actions of others, we are limiting the power of the positivity.  Offering genuine compliments to others, thanking others, and acknowledging the actions and contributions of others are terrific ways to share a positive mindset.  It costs nothing to offer any of these small gestures, yet each can have a large and lasting impact.

Sharing the Mindset in the Classroom

In the classroom, I adopted habits (again, influenced by others; I didn’t arrive at these ideas on my own) that led to making connections with students before, during, and after learning experiences.  George Couros reminds us, “To inspire meaningful change, you must make a connection to the heart, before you make a connection to the mind.”  When I was in the classroom, this included doing things like greeting students at the door as they came in the classroom.  This was the perfect opportunity to set eyes on and interact with each and every student, every day.  Greeting students told them that I valued them as an individual, and I was glad that they were a part of our classroom community.  It also afforded me the opportunity to have quick check-ins with students:  “How’s it going today?”  “Is your little brother feeling better?”  “Did you have fun at Grandma’s over the weekend?”  When kids were seated and settled, we did not dig into any content until student volunteers responded to any of the following three questions (inspired by Hal Urban):  “What are you thankful for today?  What are you happy about today?  or Do you have a good clean joke or funny story to tell?”  These three questions set the tone for the day/class period, and allowed me to learn more about each of my students.  When students left the classroom, I was at the door to bid them farewell, a perfect opportunity to offer a compliment about their work in class, thank them for their attention, or offer words of encouragement.

In my role as a Literacy Instructional Coach, I am often present at weekly grade level PLC (Professional Learning Community) meetings, where I get to observe our data coaches incorporating positive thoughts into the decisions being made at these all-important meetings.  They frequently begin meetings with quick check-ins:  “How is it going today?”  “What are we celebrating today?”  These same check-ins are easy to incorporate into professional development sessions for staff.  As a coaching staff, we make it a priority to include check-ins and/or celebrations to acknowledge the incredibly amazing job teachers are doing, day in and day out.  Speaking of incredible teachers, the following video tugs at my heart strings every time I watch it.  You can bet Ms. Flexer had a positive mindset!